The Art of Communicating with a Child

Abstract

The article discusses effective communication with the child, that is, giving satisfaction to all the participants of the interaction, which in the first place requires the knowledge of the components of the communication process. Messages sent by people entering into interaction with each other may take the form of specific stimuli and responses stemming from — according to Eric Berne — three states of ego personality: the ego state Parent, the ego state Adult and the ego state Child. These states are shaped from the early years of the child’s life and determine the quality of communication of each person with other people over the whole course of life. They decide whether transactions with others are simple, which generally promotes the continuation of the interaction, or crossed leading to a feeling of being not understood, or even to the interruption of the interaction. The article provides examples of simple and crossed transactions. Characteristics of the communication barriers have been given, named by Thomas Gordon the twelve typical ineffective behaviours of parents, teachers or bosses. The last part of the article indicated factors of effective communication with the child reflecting the adoption of the attitude “towards the child” including acceptance, passive and active listening, articulating statements of the “I” type, using the “method with no failures” in solving common problems, focusing on what is happening “here and now” in a relationship with the child.